Tag Archives: love

A life lived vicariously

One thing I really love about having a daughter is doing all the things I love to do, what I loved to do as a kid or what I missed out on doing as a kid. This is definitely what I would call living vicariously.

The weekends become a succession of first time adventures like:

  • First time on the sand in Wamberal
  • First visit to Sydney Aquarium
  • First museum visit
  • First visit to Luna Park
  • First trip to Taronga Zoo
  • First ferry trip
  • First birthday
  • First ride on a Ferris wheel
  • First movie
  • First circus
  • First bushwalk
  • First Halloween
  • First ballet at the Opera House
  • First Chinese New Year
  • First sushi train
  • First award for dancing
  • First big girls ride at Sea World
  • First scooter ride
  • First Vivid night lights
  • First visit to the dentist

The possibilities are almost endless and I honestly don’t know who is enjoying themselves more. Of course there will be less firsts as time goes on and there will be a time when my daughter won’t want me to be a part of her firsts, but I am enjoying the special moments while I can and looking forward to different sorts of first in the future.

What are your favourite firsts with your little ones? What should I add to my list? Would you like to share a story of one of your firsts? Email me on roshan@roshansramblings.com

Related posts: Discovery, Kid at Heart, Dreams vs Reality

San Francisco, 2007, Part 1: Falling in love again

Being a fan of Party of Five and Charmed, I was in love with the city of San Francisco even before I revisited. I love the rows of terrace houses, the harbour that reminds me so much of Sydney and the hilly roads. Although, I’m sure if I lived here I would get sick of those hills after a while.

My husband-to-be (HTB) and I stayed in a small room in the Tenderloin district with an ethnic supermarket next door. I was a bit apprehensive about the area having just read a book about a prostitute that lived in the Tenderloin back in the days when it was a dangerous place to live. But that was years ago and it was a nice room, so I cast these fears aside.

We started our day with a walk up the Filbert steps on Telegraph Hill to Coit Tower. The walk up the long spiral staircase punctuated by murals made the climb interesting. From the top of the tower we could see all of San Francisco’s most famous landmarks: the Golden Gate Bridge, Alcatraz, Oakland Bay Bridge, Fisherman’s Wharf, the Transamerica Building and Lombard Street. It was awesome.

Back down the hill, we went to Jackson Square with all its lovely old rounded buildings and colourful jazz murals. Murals was becoming a bit of a theme for the city! We found the foot of the Transamerica building, which turned out to be an office building.

Chinatown was pretty much like every other Chinatown all over the world- colourful with lion gates and the smell of incense in the air. I did get ripped off on the purchase of some postage stamps, which was new. Which just goes to show that no matter how much you travel, you can still become victim to a travel scam. I don’t think I ever sent postcards again after that.

The Macey’s in Union square was lit up and decorated with impressive Christmas decorations. Being the main square of San Francisco it was very busy with people rushing around running errands and shopping for Christmas presents. We found Lotta’s fountain nearby which was tinier than I expected and ran into a gay couple who gave us an Irish pub recommendation nearby.

The pub was packed, had good food, great beer and we met a guy who worked at Google. Gays and Google- you can’t get more San Fran than that!

Related posts: USA Road trip, 2007: Part 2, Grand Canyon, 2007, Las Vegas, 2007, USA Road trip, 2007, Disneyland, 2007, Los Angeles, 2007, USA, 1990

People vs Place

Discovering new places is always a big drawcard for me when I am choosing where to go to next.

I try to go to a new place every year and love discovering new towns, cities and countries.

I have more places on my want to see list than I have seen, as my Pintrest boards will attest to.

There are the places that are higher in priority like Japan, Cambodia and going on an African safari. And those I know I won’t get to for a while like Portugal, Malta and seeing the Northern lights. Plus places I don’t even know exist yet that I want to see.

Then there are my favourite places that I always want to go back to like Paris, San Francisco and New York.

So, why do I keep going back to places I have already been?

To discover new areas in places I am familiar with of course; and have new experiences.

Wherever you go and no matter for how long, there is never enough time to fit everything in. I missed Mont St Michel when I went to France and Rio de Janeiro in South America; plus all the other places in America in other states than the ones I got to.

But a lot of the time, I find myself returning to places because of the people.

I am fortunate enough to have family and friends in a few of my favourite places- London, Vancouver and Barcelona. There are more in Belgium, Singapore and Sri Lanka; plus other areas of England, America and Canada. Even around Australia if I feel like a domestic trip.

Perhaps part of the reason they are my favourite places is because of the people and the unique experiences they have given me (as well as a reason to come back). They have shown me places that are not in the guidebook or on my to see list, but turned out to be the best fun.

Of course fun times eating, drinking and going out are much better if you have some local friends to guide you. And sometimes the fun in a place is just seeing the people you love in the place that they love.

And there are always those people that I met on a trip to a place that may inspire a trip to a new place. The unknown element is one of the great things about meeting people when you travel to new places.

So I guess the perfect scenario is a mixture of both place and people. Or even better, you can meet up with people in new places to both of you and all have a great new experience together.

Who’s up for it?

Related posts: It’s a Sri Lanka Thing, It’s a French Thing

The NEW Bachelor Australia

The new Bachelor Australia aired this month and I thought I would share some of my thoughts on the franchise.

As you know, I am a fan of the American Bachelor and I also enjoy watching The Bachelorette. The show itself has a shocking success rate for long term relationships- after a combined 28 seasons of the two shows, the result has been three marriages and a five year relationship which is now over.

The Bachelors tend to go for the easy girl over the challenging one, so perhaps that’s why these matches don’t last. The Bachelorettes are easily fooled and distracted by the players. The Bachelor Pad spin off was also short lived, only lasting three seasons, when shock horror- people chose money over love and were quite happy to lie about it in the process.

Sometimes it seems that the women don’t care who they marry, they just want to get hitched and have children. Just once, I would like to see one of them say, “Actually I won’t accept your rose because I’m just not attracted to you.” Inevitably, in a house of 25 women, not everyone’s personalities are going to mesh and they become masters of confrontation and isolation of the threatener.

Most of the contestants seem to have more luck finding love with other jilted potentials outside of the show at social events connected to the show.

The Bachelor Australia franchise is not nearly as entertaining as the American version. Perhaps because America has a larger population of desperate women whose one mission in life appears to be married with children by the age of 22? Or maybe Australian women are just not as competitive with each other and therefore not as entertaining to watch?

So why do I keep watching this show? It is pure cringe-worthy entertainment. Coming from a place of someone who is married, it is easy to criticise what the girls and guys do. But if truth be told, I have a dating past as well, so can also relate to what the contestants go through.

For what, it’s worth, here are my notes on the new Bachelor Australia:

  • A white rose- good on ya Channel Ten- so not at interesting as you think
  • “I don’t need a man”- so why are you on the show?
  • I have never seen so many high splits on dresses in one room
  • Most overused expressions by the women- “Game on” and by Blake- “Likewise”
  • Talk about manufactured dates. Anyone can fall in lust when you have a dream date with the dream dress and they ply you with so much alcohol that you are absolutely hammered before desert. P.S Being a front runner at the start means you usually lose
  • A wedding photo shoot as the first group date- how original and not obvious at all (insert sarcasm here)
  • At least the losers had enough self-respect not to cry
  • Laurina is playing it perfectly- high maintenance and hard to get and the other girls are so clueless that they don’t even get that is what she is doing. She was obviously picked to create controversy and how good is calling yourself an entrepreneur when you’re actually a model? (Yes I am jealous that she is in the one profession where women earn more than men and get paid to look beautiful)
  • I like Chantal, closely followed by Lisa- they seem nice and normal. Will Blake see the light and chose one of them? Will one of them fall in love with him? And more importantly, will their love last in the real world? Only time will tell.

And that’s a wrap!

Related posts: Kicking goals, The Seven Year Itch, TV Replays and Movie Marathons, Relationships: My five (per)cents worth

TV Replays and Movie Marathons

When I was younger, Berry did not get commercial television. I used to rush home from school every day to watch Sesame Street, Postman Pat and Mr Squiggle. My punishment for being naughty was not being grounded, but being grounded from television.

When I went to visit my cousins in Canada as a teenager I was amazed at the number and channels and the variety of shows that they had. They introduced me to Beverly Hills 90210 and I was already a fan by the time it aired in Australia. I grew up with the show through high school and used to write plot summaries and buy the magazine. I also watched the spin off, Melrose Place.

Anyone who was invited to my thirtieth birthday party knows that my all-time favourite show is Buffy the Vampire Slayer. After having watched the original movie dozens of times, I was very happy when the TV series started and then came Angel as the spin off, Kindred: the Embraced and now The Vampire Diaries and the spin off The Originals.

I liked the strong women element in Buffy, so I also enjoyed Charmed, Sex and the City and the spin off Lipstick Jungle.

I dreamed of American college life in great cities and got right into Felicityset in New York, Party of Five set in San Francisco and Hellcats about competitive college cheer leading.

When reality television came out I thought it would never last. Thank god for re-released box sets and the revamping of the old nineties hits into the new 90210 and the new Melrose Place to fill the void.

But I eventually got hooked on Temptation Island, The Bachelor and The Amazing Race just like everyone else.

My mum loves the movies and got me hooked on movie marathons as a teenager.

My top movie marathons by genre from classic to new are:

  • American just for entertainment fluffy films- Clueless or My Best Friend’s Wedding, followed by Bring It On or The Sweetest Thing, finish with a visit to the cinema to watch The Other Woman
  • Supernatural- Dracula or The Craft, followed by Underworld and then Red Riding Hood- one of the more recent movies cleverly based on the darker side of fairy tales
  • Tragic love stories- Romeo and Juliet or Chasing Amy, followed by Closer, finish with a visit to the cinema to watch of a French film for a dose of reality and relationships
  • Comedy cult movies- Ferris Bueller’s Day Off or Van Wilder: Party Liaison, followed by Hitch and then The Hangover
  • Action films- Point Break, Charlie’s Angels and Layer Cake
  • Scary, but not really scary films- Scream, I Know What You Did Last Summer and Final Destination- scary films these days are too real for me
  • Reese Witherspoon- Cruel Intentions, Legally Blonde and Sweet Home Alabama
  • Kate Hudson- How to Lose a Guy in 10 days, Le Divorce and Bride Wars
  • Jennifer Anniston- Along Came Polly, The Break Up (Vince Vaughn is also hilarious) and Just Go With It.

Happy watching!

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Relationships: My five (per)cents worth

My first crush was a boy in a lot of my classes at school. I carved our initials in the tree outside of my house.

I met my high school boyfriend when I was 17 at my debutante ball after party. We had our first kiss on the beach.

The first time fell in love he was ten years older than me, we only dated for three months and it hurt like hell when he dumped me. He said that I was too young and needed to live my life, which I of course thought was ridiculous at the time, but now I realise he was right.

Some time afterwards, I met my own “Mr Big.” It was hard for a country girl like me to make friends in the city. If you didn’t go to the right private school people did not want to know you. But this guy was cool and he knew all the right people in all the fun places. If you ask him, we were never actually dating, which we did very well for about three years.

During the periods when I was single I dated a lot of different guys. I never had a list and would give anyone a chance. I had pretty much given up on relationships entirely when I met my husband to be. After ten years of dating in Sydney which is 70% gay and 25% selfish arrogant boys, I was over it, happy to stay single and seriously considering becoming a lesbian. Until I remembered that women can be super annoying too. And isn’t that always the point when you meet a man who belongs to that elusive 5%?

What I have learnt about relationships:

  • Relationships are all about compromise. If you don’t want to do this, then don’t be in one
  • There is no right one for everyone, but many different people that could be the right one and a hell of a lot of good timing for both parties involved
  • I don’t buy the whole if it’s meant to be it will happen one day or if you love someone set them free and they will come back to you. If you want to be with someone you make it happen
  • Nobody really knows what goes on between two people in a relationship, except those two people in that relationship
  • If I was single now I think I would give internet dating a go. It beats meeting people in noisy bars and if everyone is honest with their profile and what they are looking for I think it is a good way to make a start.

Related posts: Books, books and more books, TV replays and Movie Marathons